Hi Blog, I knew I been while never visit and update you, alright, a long long while i knew.
But, here I came again because I have to gave a vent to my feel. Like the title posted, how do people reacts or response when they see something or feels something that make what they feels.
Personally, I admit that I am a stubborn girl and always follow what I want to do. Maybe I am too straight in some ways, but I do consider the consequence before I response. Some times, it is so tired to think so much with what you gonna do right?
Just like, what I going to say, the listener will feel happy with that? Or will they blah blah blah.. So, I end up with I will only be myself when they are really my best and the closest friend of mine, and when I ever had a bad impression on someone with the first sight on them, I knew I will never want to get well with them. Just because I don't like them.
For an example, react manner as the chapter of today has a reason. This evening, I did a stupid thing(I knew) and the people i not fancy much saying something that sounds stupid to me. I feel kinda awkward but more anger. An invisible inner sound inside my heart raving: what the hell..it is non of your business and don't came and screw up the thing ok? And don't always react like you are the king and we people have to pleasure you.
I do not have dual personality just because my face is smiling and joking with the person after all. We still have to see each other for months so, instead of create an enemy, why not live with peace and avoid a war? Although I hate to pretend likes I like you so much. But, mum or master or anyone else please teach me how to handle this kind of problem?
Hmmm, the growing process makes me understand and learnt that life is not easy as I thought when I am a child. The more older of ages I gained, the more lesson I learnt bout life and some of them was cruel and I have to pay for the prices. It's not like I can unfriend with you because you step on my feet or you bite my fingers.
People can feels I am so cool and unfriendly when I put on my anti-social face without smiling. Self-protection built up when I knew they cant's be my friend or the one who can walk into my life. And because 12 hours putting a big smiling face is so tired and it makes my face stiff. I try my best to be very friendly and kind to of of the people I met k? I will try so even is hard for me lolxx..
I love to live in my world and enjoy my life. People come and go in my life, so I shouldn't waste my time to bother so much if there is no solutions for it. Sun still rising everyday and life still going, so living without regrets. P/s: Talk so much just to complaining today. Promise will try to talk more happy stories in the next chapter. Sorry for complaint just because I have no one to talk through right now, this moment. Felt much better after thrown out so much rubbish here, unhappy mood removed.*big truly smile* (;
Christmas is around the corner. Nikita is back, Salvatore brothers is back, happy for these.
So feast your eyes on my next chapter kay? Good night and sweet sweet dream for me. (;
